


The Apocalypse Comes To Amity Park In The Form Of... Danny?

by GothMoth



Series: Phantom Phang Phucking Phreaking Phantastical Phabulous Phic Phight Phics 1.0 (The 2019 Edition Revamped) [6]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Angry! Danny, Angry! Valerie, Broken Bones, Comedy, Crack, Danny's A Fidget Spinner, Duplication Mishaps, EVERYTHING GOES WRONG, Gen, Gray Ghost (Danny/Valerie) Ship Implied, Identity Reveal, Just So Much Yelling, Let Danny say fuck, No Mayor Vlad, No Phantom Planet Obviously, Reveal, Superheroes And Their Angermanagment Issues, Swearing, Taking A Piss On Cannon, Valerie Has A Truce With Phantom Already, Violence, Ya'll Know The Face, Yelling, dannypocalypse, duplication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:47:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27662248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothMoth/pseuds/GothMoth
Summary: In a time of desperation and spilled ice cream, Danny must use duplication to escape, but things go horribly wrong! When a wild Danny appears!
Series: Phantom Phang Phucking Phreaking Phantastical Phabulous Phic Phight Phics 1.0 (The 2019 Edition Revamped) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1994581
Comments: 6
Kudos: 45





	The Apocalypse Comes To Amity Park In The Form Of... Danny?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [heartbeatslows](https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartbeatslows/gifts).



> Previously: 9,698k

“You have got to be kidding me!”.

One trashcan lid goes flying.

“Of all the lousy timing!”.

A duck squawks angrily as It’s almost stepped on.

“Why can’t they just not!”.

Car horns blare from people far too used to Amity Parks shit. 

“For one fucking day!”.

A loud whack! is heard as someones head impacts a sign. 

“Shit! shit! shit!”.

A child cries as his ice-cream cone is knocked to the ground. 

“You know what? Fuck it!”.

Loud crashing is heard, as a running boy launches himself through a window. 

“Yeah yeah this’ll work”.

One pale black-haired boy pokes at a mirror as he turns to give a thumbs up to a floating white-haired boy. Their bodies would match in every way if not for the glowing and colour inversion. Quickly spinning around they both take in the mess of broken glass and discarded bottles around. Then snapping their heads up at the fast approaching footsteps. The black-haired one quietly shouts, “you hide or anything”, as the white-haired one zips under a pile of wood. Using his ghostly tail to make himself look like a sleeping cat. While the black-haired one pretends to be passed out in the corner, clearly visible to any incoming people. 

“Danny! Oh my god! What are you doing here!”, A women runs up and shakes the black-haired boy, who must be Danny. Danny then pretends to groggily wake up due to the shaking, “m-mom? Wha?”. Danny looks around and pretends to be unaware of his surroundings, it’s extremely effective. 

“Danny-boy, are you okay?”, A large man in orange asks. “Jack, I think it’s better we get him home”, then the lady turns back to Danny, “honey you’ve been missing all day, where have you been?”. 

_‘Running from you‘_ , “Uh, can’t say I know”, shaking his head. Jack frowns slightly, “yeah Mads, I think it’s best we just go home. I think Danny-boy here whacked his head a little too hard. Whoops”.

Just as Maddie and Jack are getting Danny -who’s still pretending to be groggy- into the Fenton assault RV. The white-haired version slips out of the building just at the wrong moment. Which tracks, considering his typical luck. “Mads! Look! Phantom! We still got a chance!”, Jack aggressively grabs the wheel spinning it around, sending the RV after the boy, “you’re not getting away this time you ectoplasmic menace!” 

_‘Oh **come on!’**_ Danny Phantom mentally grumbles. Jack’s awful driving, however, was a problem. Resulting in the vehicle careening off to the side, back doors flying open and sending Danny Fenton flying out. Whose knee jerk reaction is just to phase straight through the wall, “wait shit!”, Danny Fenton spins his head back to the wall, that a human shouldn’t have been able to go through. Just as he’s about to hop right back through a stray ectonet from his parents (again, fuck his terrible luck), flings around him, effectively cutting him off from using his powers. “Oh for Ancients sake”, Danny Fenton groans from in the net. Danny Phantom, on the other hand, flies around and through a bunch of other walls, redirecting his parents away from Danny Fenton. Throwing his hands up exasperatedly, “CRAP! SHIT! What the fuck am I supposed to do now?”, sighing, Danny Phantom gets one potentially stupid idea and he doesn’t know yet just how stupid it will be. 

Dropping to the ground to conserve and build up more energy, Danny Phantom makes haste and sneakily works his way to the wall that Danny Fenton stupidly phased through. “I am giving myself a C minus for plan creation and execution today”, Danny Fenton shakes his head, still inside the net. At that time Danny Phantom just makes it back to the wall, using his stored-up energy he duplicates again; failing to notice the sharp jab in his back. Once again white hair faces black hair, and black gives a thumbs up as he pretends to be knocked out, slouching against the wall. It worked once, it’ll -hopefully- work again. Danny Phantom quickly squeezes himself behind a wall and just fucking waits, hoping his parents don’t have a scanner on them. 

Jack and Maddie grumpily ball up their fists at the now likely escaped ectoplasmic scum. But quickly run up to Danny when they see him slumped against a wall. Maddie lifting Danny up as Jack flips the RV back over, like a straight beast. Everyone loaded back in again, they finally do indeed go home. Jack and Maddie both feeling highly guilty about the (fake)knocked out teen in the back seat. They don’t even attempt to check their scanner, instead putting their son first as they should have from the start. 

Back at the warehouse, Danny Phantom comes out of hiding and removes the weird dart from his shoulder blade; instantly feeling off. Blurting out, “okay, bad idea”, after a couple seconds, “okay, _really_ bad idea”, as suddenly there’s a fourth Danny and something about him is seriously not right. Then there’s a fifth, then sixth... and then a seventh. “Oh fuck”, Danny quickly sticks the dart back in. Thankfully, no more Danny’s split from him however the Dannys' start teleporting all over the place like a glitching hellscape. Groaning head titled back, with a hand on the dart making sure it doesn’t accidentally fall out, “what did I ever do to deserve this”, at that second one Danny teleports and smashes straight into him. Knocking the dart out. 

By the time Danny has scrambled to the dart and jabbed himself again, there’s eleven new Danny’s. “Okay now I feel like I’m going to be sick”, Danny watches the Hell show of Danny’s bouncing about, occasionally smacking each other, and slowly flips out his phone calling Sam. 

“Hey, Sam”.

_“What’s the problem now Danny_

“You’re not going to believe this but there’s, like, seventeen Danny’s right now and I can’t make it stop, without stabbing myself with this STUPID FUCKING DART! Anyways”, leaning against the wall nonchalantly, “how’s your day been?”.

Sam takes a deep fortifying breath, _“Danny, what the fuck? Do you, like, want that suppressor jacket Tucker made? And my day’s been worrying, you dick. You just up and vanished!”._

“Yeah that sounds like a good i-ack!”, getting cut off as two Danny’s slam into him, the dart comes out for only a few seconds before he shoves it back in. But that was enough time to make even more Danny’s.

_“Danny?”._

Danny flails around the hand that isn’t holding the dart, “GREAT! JUST GREAT! THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEEDED! THERE'S THREE FUCKING MORE NOW AND THEY ALL HAVE THE SAME DAMN FACIAL EXPRESSION!”.

_“Okay **Plasmius** , cool down, Tucker’s on his way to your phone's location. You Pan or Fan?”._

“Frying Pan all the way. Can’t be a Screaming Fan with this STUPID FUCKING DART IN ME! And I’ve been running all freaking day, Power bars down the drain”, sighing tiredly for added emphasis. 

_“Wow, well do I need to set up anything for when you get here?”._

“Ecto-line maybe, to control these wild Danny’s”.

_“Uh can’t you just, exert self-control”._

Danny screws up his face and scowls, “FUCKING NOPE, APPARENTLY NOT! THEY'RE JUST FUCKING TELEPORTING EVERYWHERE”.

_“That’s actually way more concerning, what the Hell”._

Turning his head to the sound of an engine, “shit, looks like Tuck’s here, so uh talk later?”.

_“Yeah sure Danny, I don’t know how your life always goes like this”._

Danny snorts, “fucking same”.

Hanging up the phone, Danny carefully works his way around all the bouncing, teleporting and floating Danny Phantom duplicates. The Danny Fenton who has finally gotten himself out of the net, phases his head through the wall and just mutters, “this is so fucked”, walking fully through the wall; Fenton follows the ‘normal’ Phantom. Tucker, then makes his way around a wall staring at his PDA. The two ‘normal’ Danny’s just stare at him as one of the wild Danny’s crashes into him. 

“What the fuck Danny!”, then Tucker looks around and to the two Dannys’ that are just standing, “uh, Danny?”. The two Dannys’ nod, “yeah, we’re fucking normal, well as normal is I or we can ever be. Welcome to Hell”. They finish as another wild Danny slams into Danny Fenton. ‘Normal’ Danny Phantom walks over to Tucker, “dude I can’t take this stupid dart ou-”, Danny Phantom gets cut off as both he and Tucker are slammed by a wild Danny. 

“This is like teleportation Danny ping-pong! What the Hell Danny!”. 

Danny Phantom snapping his head over to Tucker, “oh I dOn’T kNoW mAyBe I wAnTeD tHiS fReSh HeLl TuCkEr!!!!” ...yanking Tucker over to him, “JUST GIVE ME THE FUCKING VEST TUCK!!!”. Just as another wild Danny crashes into them sending the dart flying, “OH FUCK ME SIDEWAYS AND UP A FUCKING POLE!”. 

As more Dannys’ start popping up Tucker aggressively shoves the vest at him. Then Tucker takes off after the dart, as Danny gets the vest on and activates it. “OH THANK FUCK! IT ACTUALLY FUCKING WORKED!”, Danny Phantom flops on the ground as Danny Fenton walks over and helps Tucker avoid the wild Dannys’. Tucker shoves the dart into his pocket and immediately drags both ‘normal’ Dannys’ outside. In the process, one very exhausted Danny Phantom returns to Fenton form. 

Tucker, then looking between the two Fenton’s and then through the doorway at the forty-odd wild Danny Phantom’s. Turning back to the Fentons’, “how is this even possible? Last I checked you could only do four and that was pushing it and what the fuck is wrong with their faces?”. Danny on the left just jabs a finger at him and says, “you’re dragging our asses to Sam’s, crazy wild Dannys’ included”. The other Danny cuts in, “and all those are that darts fault and that dart is courtesy of my parents and I’ve been missing today also due to my parents and I CURRENTLY WANT TO _DIE_!”. 

Tucker just looks back into the room, unfazed by Danny’s apparent death wish, “so what are we going to do? play fucking Pokemon with your Hell Spawn, and again, what’s with the faces?”.

Glaring at Tucker right side Danny shrugs, “I fucking guess so and I don’t fucking know, IT'S NOT LIKE I HAVE ANY FUCKING CONTROL OVER THEM!”. “Fucking Zone”, Tucker breathes, “dude all I’ve got is three thermoses and obviously you don’t have one at all otherwise you would have caught some already”. Tucker looks at the Dannys’ as they just stare and slowly facepalm each other, “Danny you have got to be kidding me”. Tucker groans when left side Danny shrugs, “we were just gonna tackle them and drag them to Sam’s. Stringing them to ecto-line like fucking balloons”. Left Danny then pulls out a, clearly empty, thermos. 

“You’re a fucking tit, you know that?”. 

Right side Danny glares and then points at other Danny, “that FUCKER has been running all FUCKING day, I’ve been stuck inside a FUCKING net and the third one is off pretending to be knocked the FUCK out on the Fenton couch. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM US!”. Tucker’s jaw drops, “there’s _another_ one? Seriously? And man you’ve had one Hell of a day”. Both of them glare at him and shout, “TELL ME ABOUT IT!”. 

“Alright, Dannys’, let's take some of that, clearly pent-up, anger out on yourselves”, Tucker pausing to think, “do you think that counts as self-punishment?”. One of the Dannys’ hits him on the head with their thermos as the other says, “I can’t feel whatever happens to them others wise I’D BE SCREAMING IN FUCKING AGONY BY NOW”. 

Tucker is confused until he clues in that the wild Dannys’ are straight-up crashing into everything, spinning and teleporting rapidly. “Okay, point and I also think you would be vomiting, sweet Zone. Uh I think we should do this shit, like, now, dude”. Shrugging the two Dannys’ run in, fucking screaming, thermoses in hand and shooting the beam everywhere. Shaking his head Tucker runs in and joins the fun. Eventually, Tucker has to switch to his second thermos because, sweet fuck there are so many Dannys’.

Eventually, they stand, with shaking thermoses and one remaining wild Danny. One of the Dannys’ eyes his thermos with a mix of caution and anger, “this shit is going to FUCKING EXPLODE”. 

“Yeah no shit Danny, so I guess let’s tackle? The last one and just, like, drag It away?”. 

The other Danny shrugs, “yeah, fuck it and then we’ll throw It at Sam. Maybe the balloon idea is still useful”. Tucker chuckles, “that is going to be so fucking hilarious”. On that note, the three fucking leap on the last wild Danny as It spins in front of them. However, the wild Danny keeps teleporting; dragging the Danny’s and Tucker with It. 

Tucker cries, “HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT NOT HAPPY TIME NOT HAPPY TIME”, as one or both? Danny’s scream, “OH YOU GODDAMN FUCK, FUCK ALL OF THIS I WILL FUCK YOU WITH A POLE AND ROLL YOU IN FUCKING CAT LITTER!”. The Dannys’ just end up wailing on the wild Danny, teeth bared and basically full-on feral. Scaring the living Hell out of Tucker, as Tucker just decides fuck it and sucks the wild Danny into his over-filled thermos as well. 

The three get dropped to the ground, both Dannys’ completely startled and genuinely mad at their opponent's sudden cop-out, “WHAT THE FUCK!”, both snapping their heads towards Tucker, “TUCK! WHAT THE _FUCK_!”. Tucker just throws his hand up at the two feral ass Dannys’, “dude it needed to be done, chill out”, lowering his hands, “though honestly, I shouldn’t be surprised that you’d be so eager to beat yourself up”. 

The two Dannys’ get up and silently stalk over to him, grabbing both his arms as he internally freaks out. They drag him outside the building, Tucker finally rights himself and gets them to let go. Tucker digs into his pockets and throws down a tiny disc creating a tiny self-contained ghost trap and he puts the thermoses inside. Both Dannys’ follow suit, though they do it angrily. 

“Dudes, my car’s just down there. Like always I’ll ask you, _try_ not to destroy it.” Both Dannys’ flip him off but then all three of them burst out laughing, “this is easily the weirdest fucking thing to ever happen to me, and whoops”. Tucker instantly stops, “whoops what Danny?”...”DANNY WHOOPS WHAT?”. One of the Dannys’ gives him his answer, “third me joined us in laughing and now mom and dad thinks he has a concussion”. Tucker laughs some more, “wow this day really really hates you”. 

* * *

Meanwhile, in the Fenton household. “Jazz I’m fine, I swear!”. Jazz glares at him, “Danny, you keep barely containing laughter, jerking randomly, and you’re basically furious for no reason. You are _not_ fine”. 

Danny falls back groaning against the sofa as his parents hover around him and Jazz, kicking his legs and silently screaming into the pillow. Rolling back over he growls and stares defiantly at the ceiling. _‘I really wish she knew our code terms right about now. At least other mes are off to Sam’s now. This is all just fucking peachy, fucking great’_. Jazz snaps her fingers in Danny’s face, “there you go being all pissed off again”. Maddie chimes in, “Jasmine, sweetie, are you sure he doesn’t need to go to the hospital?”. Both Jazz and Danny quickly say, “no, that’s not needed”.

Danny, trying to salvage the situation, “how ‘bout I just take a nap, right here, and we can all see how, TOTALLY FINE I AM. Once I’m awake and y’all have CHILLED OUT”. Danny forcibly curls up on the couch pulling blankets over his shoulders. 

Jazz shakes her head slightly, “fine. But I’m staying here and watching you for _anything_. And I mean anything”, knowing damn well her meaning is very much understood. Danny, of course, doesn’t actually fall asleep but he makes a damn good show of it. 

Jazz eventually shoos Jack and Maddie to bed and as soon as they’re gone Danny snaps his eyes open. Jazz, startled, “Danny what the Hell?”. 

Rolling his eyes, “I was waiting for them to go because they _don’t know_ ”. Jazz is confused for a heartbeat but then nods, “ah so ghost thing then?”. Danny responds with a chuckle, “I’m a duplicate Jazz, mom and dad spent all day running after me so much so that I had to duplicate to trick them away. But then I had to do it again because they found Phantom me _again_ , and then I entered a brand new fresh Hell”. 

Jazz stares and then shakes her head, “so where’s the real you or aren’t your duplicates real yous as well? And what do you mean by ‘Hell’?”, Jazz quickly looks up checking that Jack and Maddie really are in bed. 

“The other two are with Tuck and about forty or fifty other Dannys’”. 

At that Jazz goes completely bugged eyed, “what? How?”. Danny huffs, “like I told Tuck, like, two hours ago. Parents got me with a weird dart and my duplication powers went fucking nutty. Got Tuck to bring a power suppression vest we designed, shit fucking works it seems, and now we’re heading to Sam’s to try and fix my shit”. Jazz shakes her head, “so what there’s, what fifty or so invisible yous all flying into one house?”. Danny bursts out laughing at this, “fuck no, all the duplicates that resulted from the dart thing are completely fucked up. Bouncing all over the goddamn place, teleporting and shit. To kick that shit off I have no fucking control over them at all so they’re all stuffed in thermoses”. Jazz rubs her temples, “well I can’t let you, or at least this you, go over to Sam’s. That would be too suspicious”, sighing, “so you’ll just have to stay put and try to act normal”. 

Danny stares at her, “fucking normal? Really? and how fucking well has that worked so far. I’m exhausted, been assaulted multiple times by myself, assaulted myself, and did I mention that the stupid vest is very fucking uncomfortable?”. Jazz raises her eyebrows so Danny continues on with his rant, “it’s like being fucking pressure cooked inside a pot filled with nails. But if I take it off BAM! More fucking wild Dannys’. Plus, so long as it’s on I can’t absorb any duplicates. It’s fucking exhausting controlling three fucking bodies. Being stuck in a net for hours also wasn’t any fucking fun, they’re not made for comfort you know. Oh and both my legs are fucking busted from going out a fucking window and shit-“ Danny bats away Jazz’s hand as she, alarmed, tries to check his legs. “Not these fucking legs, my originals. I don’t even think Tuck’s fucking noticed since I’ve been fucking floating every damn where. But I had to run on them for a bit to conserve energy earlier so they’re probably pretty damn fucked”. 

Jazz sits, massaging her temples, “is there literally anything I can do, Danny? And _please_ have your original stay off your or his legs”. 

Danny chuckles, “Jazz, all you can really do is help convince mom and dad I’m fine so I can go over to Sam’s as soon as possible. The trips going to take about another ten minutes. So it’d be fucking fantastic if I could focus on the shit going down there, rather than trying to put my effort towards managing mom and dad here”. 

Jazz sighs, “I’ll do what I can little brother, for now you can just pretend to be sleeping at least. Think you can tell me what the dart looks like though, so I can check the lab for it?”. 

Danny facepalms, “yeah, fuck, that’s probably a good idea. I don’t know what colour the liquid or whatever inside was but it’s about the size of my thumb, has a flaming Fenton F on it -because _of course_ it does-, and the needle part is really fucking long”. 

Jazz pats Danny on the shoulder as she gets up, “alright, you get some sleep and try to sort this out”. 

With that, Jazz heads down to the lab with one more look in on her parents, who have both fallen asleep. 

* * *

Tucker pulls up to Sam’s place and the Danny’s phase them and their cargo straight into her room. Sam gives them a curious smirk, “wow that took you, three? A while. What the Hell happened?”. 

Tucker’s the first to open his mouth, “well the Dannys’ basically assaulted us, we had to play Pokemon with them, and Danny’s parents think his other duplicate has a concussion”. 

One of the Dannys’ throws his hands up, “yeah because I’m acting fucking nutty because of dealing with these FUCKING THINGS!”, he gestures wildly to the thermoses, “don’t need the ectoline anymore by the way. Oh, also both legs are fucking smashed”. Tucker whips around, “dude what! When?”. And Sam aggressively says, “sit”, while pointing to her bed after putting plastic on it. 

Danny explains while gesturing a hand around wildly and floating to sit down if front of Sam, “when I fucking launched myself out a DAMN window after being smacked in the face by a SIGN and destroying a child’s ice-cream cone”.

Sam rolls her eyes, “you damn monster”. 

“I couldn’t fucking float ‘cause my power bar was down the drain. Still kinda is but not so damn bad”. 

Tucker shakes his head, “dude, again, today hates you”. The second Danny floats over to Tucker as the first Danny lifts up his pant legs, “you have any more vests? ‘Cause while this shit is horribly fucking uncomfortable it’s better than descending waves of wild Dannys’ upon Amity Park”. Tucker shakes his head, “no, but I’ll get right on that ‘cause yeah I don’t want to see another one of them ever”. Sam rolls her eyes, “could they really be that bad, basically they’re just Danny but not under his control, right?”. 

Both Tucker and the two Dannys’ all say, “sweet Zone fucking no”. Just as Sam exclaims, “Ancients Danny! Did you, like, walk around on them like this or something?!”. The Dannys’ smirk. “You fucking did you moron!”, Sam slaps him over the head as she gets to work fixing his shredded legs. 

After about an hour the second Danny pipes up, “hey, Jazz found some more of what is likely the STUPID FUCKING DARTS that did this. And of course there’s no already made cure for it because WHY WOULD THERE FUCKING BE!”. Tucker waves off the Danny, “we’ll just have to make our own; nothing new. Think other you or Jazz could get it here?”. Danny shakes his head, “no they’re basically under lockdown till that Danny’s deemed healthy. But I don’t see why this Danny can’t go”. Danny starts to float but promptly slams back down with an angry growl, both Dannys’ suddenly looking much worse for the wear. 

“Uh dude, I think that’s not happening. I’ll just go myself”. 

The Danny slumped on the windowsill flat out growls, “this is FUCKING STUPID!”. Sighing, Sam asks the Danny she’s working on, “should we be concerned?”. That Danny shakes his head tiredly, “no it’s just because of all the duplication and actively maintaining three bodies. The fucked up Dannys’ don’t seem to be a drain but the two true fuckers are”. The other Danny turns his head over, “hey, I take offence to that!”. Which causes for Sam to look quite concerned. The windowsill Danny rolls his eyes, “fuckin’ chill Sam, I’m stuck with this bullshit for now so I’m going to fucking dick around with it. Ancients I could use a fucking nap”.

Broken Danny flops back in the bed, earning a glare from Sam, “I’m trying to fix your legs you know, and I hate to say it but this is a lost cause. You are actually going to have to go get this fixed, Danny”. 

Windowsill Danny is the one to respond, “ha! BeCaUsE tHaT wIlL gO oVeR sO fUcKiNg WeLl! Hey, Mr. And Mrs. Fenton your son came in with his legs straight fucked”, moving his hands wildly, “what do you mean doctor? He’s sitting on our fucking couch with a probable concussion”. 

Sam sighs, “yeah well, Danny only so much can be done without actual major surgical equipment. And they won’t let even me buy that stuff”, huffing, “they’re afraid of start-up serial killers or something”. 

This time bed Danny replies, “well then I’ll just wait my legs out and see if they fix themselves”. 

Sam stands up so she knows he can see her glaring, “Danny that’s completely moronic, the sooner you go the better. This isn’t going to magic itself away”. All she gets out of bed Danny before he passes out is, “says you”. 

—During that time at Fenton works—

Jazz watches as Danny just sorta groans and then suddenly looks like he just ran a marathon. “Danny, you alright there?”, concern filling her voice. 

“Yeah just tired and drained, by now I’d normally have automatically reabsorbed my duplicates but I can’t with the vest on. So I’m still expending energy maintaining them, oh and Tuck’s on his way over for the darts”.

Jazz nods understandingly, “I’ll give it to him when he gets here but you need to actually sleep or let the original you sleep”. Danny just tiredly waves her off before wiggling into his blankets. By the time Tucker gets there Danny is out cold. 

Jazz hands over the darts she found, “Tucker, quick question, just how bad are actual Danny’s legs?”. Tucker, pulling out the one from his pocket, confirms they’re the same before answering, “pretty bad, the idiot walked with them all busted up”. Jazz sighs, “I know, he mentioned that while ranting. I’m not impressed”.

Tucker, chuckling, “I don’t think anyone is but-”. Tucker is cut off by a massive explosion. Tucker sighs but Jazz is the one to speak, “I don’t want any of hims’ going off fighting. I don’t care what it is, Danny gets the night off”. Tucker chuckles, “tell that to Danny not me...”, Tucker trials off as he stares at the road, “oh no”. 

“Whatever it is Danny’s not dealing with it”. 

Tucker just side-eyes her, “uh actually it’s Danny or a Danny that needs to be _dealt with_ ”. Jazz juts her head out the door as she says, “what?”. Quickly she spots Danny floating in the street with a strange facial expression when It suddenly is above someone’s house and then slams into a mailbox. “Dear Ancients, that’s one of the wild Dannys’ isn’t it. Ancients that’s weird”. 

Tucker nods, “yeah now imagine forty of them all doing that in a small room”. 

Tucker turns and waves bye at her as he runs off back to Sam’s. Leaving Jazz to shake her head at Danny’s sleeping form though she pauses when she notices that he almost looks like he’s glitching occasionally, “well there’s no way that’s good”. 

* * *

When Tucker gets back he sees that Sam’s side window and wall have all been blown out, one Danny is passed out in the grass and Sam appears to be carrying the other. Shouting at Tucker when she spots him, “we need to get both of them somewhere safe to recharge! And holy Hell you guys’ were not kidding about these things being Hell-spawn!”. Just as she finishes a wild Danny knocks her feet out as It slams into them, causing her to fling broken legs Danny onto the ground. 

Grunting awake, that Danny goes to get up but Tucker rushes over, “dude, no you are way too drained. Go back to sleep”. Tucker, picking him up, yells to Sam, “grab the other! We’ll take them to Danny’s house! Mine’s too far away and we have to deal with this bullshit before they destroy the town!”.

Sam yells back, “Roger that! He can heal faster in his room anyways!”, as she hoists up the lawn Danny. Booking it down the street to Danny’s house. 

* * *

Jazz is watching the broadcast of the dubbed ‘dannypocalypse’ that just started on Ghost Watch, as Sam and Tucker burst in carrying two unconscious Dannys’. Sam quirks an eyebrow, “how the Hell aren’t your parents up?”, as she and Tucker take the Dannys’ to his/their room. 

Once they run back down as quietly as they can Jazz answers, “dad can sleep through anything and mom has special earplugs to sleep through dad”. The two nod as they rush to the lab, coming back up with many thermoses in tow. Quickly running right out the door, shouting back, “take couch Danny to his room!”. 

Jazz quickly does so, though she’s not sure why, before she shakes her head as she turns back to the screen covered in Dannys’ going everywhere like ping-pong balls of doom while also teleporting randomly. One flies face first at the camera with Its never-changing facial expression, almost making her scream. Shaking herself off, “at least they’re all Phantoms’, otherwise Danny would be completely outed”. Jazz opts to go back to the lab, to see what else she can find. 

It doesn’t take her too long to find the plans for the darts. “Well, this would have been useful to find earlier. Tucker could use these I’m sure”. Sitting down, Jazz elects to read over the plans herself. Eventually wheezing out with a head shake, “oh Danny is going to love this”. 

* * *

Sam and Tucker spend most of the night rounding up the Dannys’ but early on they had been joined by The Red Huntress. Who had promptly yelled at them, “what the Hell are you two doing?!”. Tucker, looking up, “what does it look like? Making fine wine?”. 

Gliding down near them she fires a blast at a wild Danny, making It spin but leaving It completely unharmed, “what the Hell is up with these things!? They're like indestructible!?”. Tucker chuckles as he catches another wild Danny in his thermos, “for once you really truly can blame the Fentons’!”. Sam shoots Tucker a warning glare but he just rolls his eyes at her. 

The Red Huntress full on stops mid air and drops to the ground, “what the Hell do you mean?!”, and walking up to Tucker. Tucker whips out his PDA, scrolls a bit and shows her the image some kid had captured of the offending dart hitting Danny Phantom in the back with the Fenton’s holding the weapon. Shaking her head, “Jesus Christ what the Hell was in that! And you’d think after everything they would have stopped going after him!”. Shrugging, Sam points out the obvious, “that’s stubborn grown-ups for you”. 

Eventually catching up a sizeable amount of Dannys’, The Red Huntress walks up to the two of them; deciding now is a good time as any to have a relaxed conversation in the middle of the street as the remaining wild Dannys’ wreak havoc in the background. “You two have any clue where the actual Phantom is or how to fix this?”. Tucker smirks, “well hopefully, he’s resting because there’s no way this-”, gesturing at the occasional wild Danny, “-isn’t exhausting”. The Red Huntress nods curtly, “yeah from what I’ve seen duplication is really tiring but there’s something seriously wrong with these duplicates”. Sam mutters, under her breath, “yeah no shit”. 

The Red Huntress shrugs, “well whatever, I’m going to the Fenton’s to see if I can find that dart thing and tear a new one into those idiots”. The Red Huntress turns to leave but Tucker snatches out to grab her arm, “no!”, composing himself as she eyes him, annoyed. Tucker fishes in his pants, producing the empty dart, “already done and the Fenton’s are sleeping. Personally, I don’t want them waking up to this and trying to ‘deal with it’ themselves”. 

The Red Huntress takes the dart and eyes it, “I figured as much, you were probably already hanging out at the Fenton’s when this happened. Where is Danny anyways?”. Sam and Tucker both shrug unable to come up with a good excuse. “Figures, that kid runs off at the worst of times. But I _AM_ going to Fenton Works and I _AM_ berating those two. They deserve to experience this bullshit, reap what they sow and all that”. The Red Huntress zips away before either can stop her. 

“Well fuck”, is all Tucker has to say as the once hunter of Danny Phantom flies to Danny’s house, which has two too many Dannys’ in it. At that very moment another car alarm goes of as the stiff arm of a wild Danny impales it. 

* * *

The Red Huntress speeds over to Fenton Works and knocks angrily on the door. Jazz, all too familiar with angry knocks, glares at the door as she walks over, “well look another pissed off basket case, hooray for me”. Opening the door she’s shocked to find The Red Huntress on the other side. Composing herself quickly, “let me guess, you want Fenton tech to help deal with the dannypocalypse?”. As The Red Huntress steps in aggressively, “Tucker apparently is already working on the dart thing so no, I’m here to shout angrily at YOUR DAMN PARENTS”. 

The Red Huntress, quickly stalks up the stairs before Jazz can stop her but just before she gets past Danny’s room one of the Dannys’ pitches out the door crashing to the floor in front of her. Both The Red Huntress and Jazz yelp, “Danny! Are you okay?”. The Red Huntress momentarily forgets about the Fenton parents’ in lue of helping Danny. However, one of the other Dannys’ was already dragging that Danny by his feet back into the room. Looking up, the second Danny locks eyes with The Red Huntress‘s helmet. Who quickly jerks her head up and down from Danny to Danny as Jazz just stares in shock. 

No one’s really surprised when The Red Huntress borderline yells, “Danny?! Danny what the HELL!”, but gets quickly hushed by Jazz. While the floor Danny replies, “uh, hi?”. The third Danny, with still broken legs, groans, “THIS DAY COULDN'T GET ANY MORE FUCKING PERFECT!”, from inside the room. Causing The Red Huntress to shove her head in the door as Jazz pinches her nose. 

The Red Huntress, no longer giving a shit, as she takes in the sight of a _third Danny_ , rips off her helmet. Her promptly, and honestly understandably, yelling, “WHAT THE FUCK!”. Jazz throws her hands up, completely giving up on the hope of some peace and quiet. She then follows Valarie, as she storms fully inside Danny’s room. Jazz stops to help the second Danny heave the floor Danny off the floor and onto a beanie-bag. Sighing, “why can’t you ever just let yourself sleep, Danny”. 

Valarie paces back and forth, “why are there three of you? HOW are the three of you? What is going on? WHO ARE YOU?!”. 

Danny mutters, “a lot of fucking bullshit that’s what”, before genuinely responding, “now is, like, _the worst_ fucking time Val, BUT GOOD GODDAMN FUCK IT!”. The broken Danny flails his arms straight up smacking another Danny in the face. Beanie-bag Danny and just-fucking-smacked-in-the-face Danny turn and glare at broken Danny. Prompting broken Danny to shout, “I will hit me IF I DAMN WELL WANT TO!”, as the just-fucking-smacked-in-the-face Danny starts weakly smacking him, which then descends into a slap fight. Valarie rips them apart shouting, “I’ll repeat, WHAT THE FUCK DANNY!”. 

The beanie-bag Danny stands up and points at her as she turns her head to him, still holding the two other Dannys’ wrists in the air, “EVERY SINGLE KIND OF FUCK! EVERY SINGLE ONE! FENTON PHANTOM, PHANTOM FENTON! SAME FUCKING THING! NOW _PUT ME DOWN_!”. Jazz then realises that broken Danny’s actually being lifted off the bed as Valarie quickly drops both Dannys’. Broken Danny rubs a hand down his left leg, “fucking Ancients, FUCK ME SO MUCH!”. Jazz runs over, yanking his pant leg up to check for bleeding. Groaning, she runs downstairs to get fresh bandaging.

Valarie, wide-eyed and worried, “what happened to your leg?”, and not even half a second later, “WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘SAME FUCKING THING!’? WHAT THE FUCK!”. The Danny that was previously on a beanie-bag grabs her shoulders, spinning her around, and just straight up transforms into Phantom in front of her. “HOW THE FUCK!”, Valarie jumps a couple of inches off the floor and nearly falls over but standing Danny Fenton catches her. Just as Sam, Tucker and Jazz all run into the room. 

Sam takes in how Danny looks like he had just dipped Valerie down while swing dancing and smirks, “wow, didn’t know you two? Had gotten back together”, and puts a hand on her hip while she waves around her thermos.

Danny Phantom, being closest to the door, looks his friends up and down; noting their dishevelled appearances, “okay, what the fuck did I miss?”. 

Valarie, pulling out of Danny’s hold and struggling back to her feet, “we haven’t and how? Seriously _how_? Did you miss THE FUCKING SWARM OF PHANTOMS’ OUTSIDE!”. All three Dannys’ snap their heads to Sam and Tucker as Jazz slips over to broken Danny, getting to work on his leg. Sam, noticing, “did you fuck your legs up again, you moron?”. While Tucker explains, “the wild Dannys’ all fucking escaped dude”. 

All three Dannys’ shout, “WHAT!”; everyone flinching to cover their ears. Tucker turns to Jazz, “how in the Hell are your parents still asleep?”. At this Jazz just shrugs. Meanwhile, Sam groans out, “yeah and they blew up my damn room, I don’t even have walls anymore!”. 

Valarie starts waving her hands around, “whoa whoa, wait what? You mean to tell me you _already_ captured them all once! And again What. The. Hell. Danny!”. Jazz sighs, “apparently they did, and the rundown is basically this-”, taking a deep breath, “-Danny is half ghost, called a Halfa, and Phantom is his ghost form. The basement ghost portal messed him up when it turned on-“. Broken Danny cutting in with, “with me inside it, might I fucking remind you”. Jazz continuing, “-basically half killing him. But our parents don’t know so could you. Stop. Shouting”. 

Valarie looks from Danny to Danny, taking in all three. Slightly hurt, “why didn’t you FUCKING TELL ME YOU MORON! I’ve been fucking hunting you and all this fucking time you-! I could have _KILLED YOU_!”. Suddenly one last wild Danny whizzes past the window as Tucker groans before running down the steps. Valarie, sitting down finally, “and what the Hell Danny, how did this-”, she gestures towards the three Dannys’, “-and that-“, jabbing her thumb at the window, “-happen?!”. 

The Phantom Danny opts to do the explaining, for what feels like the fiftieth time, “parents’ chase me. Duplicate to escape, twice. Get darted. Wild Dannys’ everywhere. And before you ask, I DO NOT HAVE ANY FUCKING CONTROL OVER THEM!”. 

“And the legs?”.

Sam and Jazz respond in unison, “he jumped through a window”. 

Valarie looks at the broken Danny, “and why didn’t you just float or whatever you moron”. Broken Danny crosses his arms, “I was too fucking exhausted okay. I’d been running all fucking day. And as soon as my parents found Fenton me they had the FUCKING AUDACITY TO ASK ME WHERE I HAD BEEN ALL FUCKING DAY!”. 

Tucker, coming back in, shakes his head, “dude, at this point you should just tell them”. 

All the Dannys’ roll their eyes and broken Danny asks, “so have you figured out how to fix this yet so I can take this STUPID FUCKING THING OFF!”, Danny points at his vest. Tucker just lets his hands fall limp to his sides, “dude, I haven’t even had a chance to look at the darts. I’ve been chasing yous’ all over town”. 

Jazz perks up as she remembers the dart plans, pulling them out of her back pocket she shoves them at broken Danny. “I found this in the lab after Tucker left. Thankfully, it’s not harmful but well...”, she trails off as Danny glares angrily at the paper, then Tucker grabs it away. Slowly the paper is passed around as everyone, even Valarie, begins to snicker. Not-broken Danny Fenton mutters, “I’m going to fucking kill you all”. Jazz smirks, “Danny, it’s pretty funny. If you had used literally any other power before getting darted you wouldn’t be in this mess”. Broken Danny crosses his arms and grumbles like a petulant child, “I was conserving energy”. 

“And there lies the irony”, Tucker sticks a finger in the air, “in trying to conserve energy you stuck yourself in a way where you expend even _more_ energy”. Earning a glare from Danny, “I will strangle you in your sleep”. Jazz smacks his head, “not on these legs you won’t”. 

Danny smacks his own forehead, “I really am a dumbass”. Tucker smirks while speaking, “that’s what we’ve all been telling you for a long ass time, dude”, as broken Danny sits up and simultaneous changes to Phantom and into his ghostly tail. Everyone jerks at the loud snapping sounds that makes. 

“DANNY WHAT THE FUCK!”.

“YOU REALISE YOU’RE A DUMBASS ONLY TO BE A DUMBASS!”.

“HOW DOES THIS HELP ANYTHING!”. 

Broken Danny rolls his eyes as he changes his tail back to legs. Having functionally reset every piece of bone into its rightful spot. Sam just gapes, “how the?”, as she runs over inspecting his still mangled legs but no longer with bones or bone chips out of place, “I’m not sure whether to call you a dumbass for not doing that sooner or call you a genius for knowing that would work”. Tucker eyes Danny, “you _did_ know that would work right?”. All three Dannys’ just shrug as everyone else sighs.

Tucker, turning back to the plans and the darts in his hand, “I’m going to be in the lab actually getting somewhere on this”; he jumps down the steps two at a time. 

After a few minutes of awkward silence, Valerie breaks it, “so... how the Hell have you guys been telling the Dannys’ apart?”. Both Sam and slightly-less-broken-but-still-broken Danny answer with, “we haven’t been”. Danny, shrugging, “they’re all me so it doesn’t really matter which one you talk to”. 

Valarie shakes her head, “yeah well, that’s too damn weird for me today. I’m all maxed out on weird”. 

Sam sighs, “okay then...”, looking around to the Dannys’, “how the Hell are we going to tell you three apart?”. While she turns to face the Danny that’s closest to her, which happens to be broken Danny. Jazz supplies, “well doesn’t Original Danny have to wear the suppressor vest, so he’s easy”. Valerie immediately grumbling, “and that still leaves two”, still rather freaked out at the sight of there being three Dannys’. 

“You know what? We’ll just fucking wear wrist bands”, as broken Danny grabs a white cuff, Fenton Danny puts on a black cuff, and Phantom Danny lifts up a green cuff. 

Jazz, taking the three in, “yeah, that’ll work. Subtle but noticeable, comfy yet stylish”. 

Tucker interjects through Danny’s phone, _“and in your colours, all you’d need is red and you’d have your entire make up”._

White Danny rolls his eyes, “Tuck, I also have blue eyes”. Everyone can hear Tucker slap his own face as Valarie mutters, “are we just going to ignore the fact that Tucker’s on the phone without there being a call”. White Danny rolls his eyes, “he fucking hacked it, what’s new... though he SHOULD BE FOCUSED ON _OTHER THINGS_!”. 

_“It’s not like I’m holding the damn phone and you know how I hate being out of the loop”,_ to Tucker’s credit they can hear him tinkering away. 

“If anyone gets to be pissy about being out of the loop it’s me, YOU FUCKS!”, Valerie cuts in as black Danny rubs his neck. White Danny yells, “well, you spent all your time TRYING TO FUCKING MURDER ME!”. She glares at him and huffs, “I WOULD HAVE STOPPED IF YOU FUCKING TOLD ME!”. Black Danny throws his hands up, “I AINT NO FUCKING MINDREADER! MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING ASKED!”. Valerie gapes at him, “HOW THE FUCK WAS I EVEN SUPPOSED TO KNOW THIS SHIT WAS POSSIBLE! NO ONE ASKS ABOUT THE IMPOSSIBLE _DANNY_!”.

Sam smirks, “and that right there is why no one has figured you out yet, Danny”. Green Danny glares at Sam, “WELL THAT’S FUCKING STUPID AND THIS TOWN IS FUCKING STUPID!”. Everyone else just shrugs, unable to disagree. 

Then a realization dawns on Valerie, “you, you fucking dated me even though you knew I was trying to kill you?”. Sam nods as does every Danny. Prompting Valerie to continue, “ARE YOU COMPLETELY _INSANE_!”. Sam smirks, “that’s what I said. But Mr. Deathwish over here didn’t care”. 

“LET ME BURY MY SELF-PRESERVATION IN PEACE!”. 

While both Sam and Valerie groan, white Danny rubs at his chest annoyed that it seems tighter. When suddenly he hears cracking sounds and all the Dannys’ look at the vest. 

“OH, YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!”, White Danny cries as he watches the pieces of his suppression vest explode outwards, as if in slow-motion. Instantaneously, over three hundred wild Dannys’ explode out of him like an absurdist supernova. The grand overwhelming mass of Dannys’ blasts out Danny’s walls, floor and ceiling, destroying half the house and leaving Danny and co. sprawled all over the blast site. Somehow, through sheer cosmic luck, his parents' bedroom and lab are fully intact; parents’ still sound asleep. 

White Danny stands slouching in the centre of everything, wild-eyed and growling. Eventually, as Sam and the two other Dannys’ stagger up, white Danny shouts, “FUCK ME AND MY VERY EXISTENCE! I AM AN AFRONT TO GOD AND I FUCKING LIKE IT THAT WAY!”, before he collapses, unconscious. 

Valerie rolls over, covered in dirt and a knife? as hundreds of wild Dannys’ spin, smack, and crash everywhere. Jazz wanders over to the tv as it springs back to life telling of the dannypocalypse’s sudden return after mysteriously vanishing. Tucker groans, “not again...”. And Valarie violently shakes black Danny, “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR YOU MORON!-“, only to get cut off by a wild Danny. 

Suddenly, Tucker bolts up and fucking sprints to the lab, being the only one to notice in the mayhem that even _more_ wild Dannys’ are being formed at this very second. He doesn’t even bother taking the stairs, just straight flings himself down. Moving wildly to piece together a fix for this bullshit. Chanting, “fuck me, fuck this, fuck everything”. His manic inventing is highlighted by a backdrop of screaming, destruction, thermos noises, and an endless waterfall of swears. 

* * *

Up above, Sam screams, “TUCKER! WHERE’S THE OTHER DAMN VEST!? TUCKER!”, looking around unable to find him, “FOR FUCKS SAKE! YOU BETTER BE EITHER DEAD OR OFF DOING SOMETHING USEFUL OR SO HELP ME!”. 

The two ‘normal’ Dannys’ aggressively slap the Hell out of white Danny’s face, “WAKE UP LIEUTENANT!”. Valarie glares at them as she pole vaults over a wild Danny only to get smacked by two others, “THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR VIDEO GAME REFERENCES! HOLY SHIT! IS EVERYTHING A JOKE TO YOU!”. White Danny is slapped into consciousness just in time to hear that last bit, “YOU BET IT FUCKING IS! I DO WHAT I WANT BECAUSE I! AM! GOD!”. 

A sledgeHammer slams into the white Danny’s feet, “MUST GOD MOCK ME!”. Looking around the trio of Dannys’ realises the wild Dannys’, in their wild workings, are kicking up and flinging around all the contents he’s stored in that part of the house for years. 

Valerie shouts back at them, “I THOUGHT YOU _WERE_ GOD”, as green Danny dive bombs her from behind. “YEAH AND I’M MOCKING MYSELF!”, Green Danny shouts at her as he rolls away from an incoming wild Danny that has two knives sticking out of Its chest. 

Valerie makes a face at him, “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR! YOU MADE ME MISS!”. Green Danny just glares and points to the needles stabbed into the ground where she once was. She speaks with slightly wide eyes, “WHAT THE FUCK! WHY ARE THEY THROWING STUFF!”. 

Sam slams up against the last bit of inside kitchen wall, the five others running to join her; thermoses all full. Sam wags her finger at white Danny, “NOT YOU! YOU'LL JUST FILL THE INSIDE OF THE HOUSE WITH THESE HELLSPAWN”. 

White Danny stops, growls, and throws his arms out to the side, “WELL FUCK YOU TOO THEN!”. Just as a new wild Danny spawns out of him and collides head-on with another wild Danny, inches away from white Danny. The impact sends him flying into the road. Sam and the others can’t see him but they do hear all three ‘normal’ Dannys’ -two of which are inside with Sam, Jazz and Valarie- shout, “HAVEN'T MY LEGS SUFFERED ENOUGH FOR MY SINS!”. 

Sam shakes her head and mutters, “Jesus fucking Christ. I don’t have any more damn bandages”. Valarie grabs the black Danny, “again, WHY THE FUCK are they throwing stuff!”. Danny shoves her off him with his teeth bared, “they’re FUCKING NOT”. Jazz interrupts, “I think what Danny’s trying to say is, they’re stirring up everything in their path and, by sheer velocity, sending every piece of debris and random items all over the place”. 

Valarie, looking outside, “WHY THE FUCK DO YOU OWN SO MANY WEAPONS AND SHARP THINGS!”. Sam just sighs, “blame Danny, he hides things intangibly inside his walls. He probably has enough to supply an army in his room walls alone”. 

“OF COURSE I FUCKING DO! HAVE YOU SEEN MY FUCKING LIFE!”. 

Hearing a sudden explosion down the street, Sam sighs, “Danny, even _I_ think it’s completely insane to keep FUCKING GRENADES inside the walls”. 

Jazz jumps just as a wild Danny head smashes Its head straight through the only unbroken window, expression never changing. Valerie jumping as well, “HOLY FUCK!...and Danny, why the Hell would you make you own room a death trap!”.

“BECAUSE DEATH GIVES ME LIFE AND EVERY TIME I NEED SOMETHING IT’S FUCKING MOVED! IF ONLY I CAN TOUCH IT THEN NO ONE CAN FUCK WITH MY SHIT!”. 

Both Dannys’ spin around and crouch, ready to pounce, as Tucker races up the steps; his glasses missing a lense. Bending over and huffing wildly he sticks his hand out, a funky blue dart in it. Green Danny, straightening up, mutters, “you just had to make it blue to spite me, didn’t you”. Everyone can see Tucker’s grin as he tilts his head up, other hand still on his knees, “now you’re fucking complete, dude. And I, am redeemed”. 

Sam just shakes her head as she grabs the dart and shoves it into green Danny’s palm, “you’re the one with ghost powers, and you’re the one duplicating to Hell and back. Go fix your shit”. 

Valarie steps up, “oh Hell no, this moron is not going by himself”. Black Danny puts his hands on his hips, “NO FUCKING SHIT”, and points at himself. Valarie just glares at black Danny, “YOU’RE BOTH THE SAME DAMN PERSON! IT DOESN'T COUNT! A MORON TIMES TWO IS STILL A MORON!”. Sam groans, “just go out there you angry babies, sweet Plasmius”. Both Dannys’ and Valerie roll their eyes at Sam as they bolt out. 

Sam leans over to Jazz, “they’re so getting back together”. Tucker smirks as he overhears, “they’re our atomic power couple, get it? Since they’re both walking warheads?”. Jazz groans, “Danny has tainted you”. Sam just shrugs, “well, they _are_ a match made in anger, clearly”. 

Tucker flops down onto the ground as the house shakes and a wild Danny comes crashing in and just starts ping-pong bouncing around. The two girls swat at It with brooms. Jazz shakes her head, “I think I better grab more thermoses. We don’t know that Danny will even be able to reabsorb any of these monstrosities”. Sam calls to her as Jazz runs over to the lab, lightly stepping over needles, knives, two swords and what looks like a jigsaw trap?, “Ms. Psychology textbook! why is it that teenage superheroes are all so angry and aggressive!?”. 

Jazz yells from down the steps, “because the ones who aren’t die!”, continuing as she comes back up, arms full of sweet sweet thermos, “you can’t face the things they do, day after day, carry the responsibilities, and keep deep secrets like that; without being an energetic firecracker. Aggressive anger is like determination on steroids”. Handing out the thermoses they prepare for another assault on the wild Dannys’ as they hear someone, most likely a Danny shout, “VEHICULAR MANSLAUGHTER YOU FUCKING FUCK!”. 

They come out in time to see Valerie, on her board, straight up throw one of the ‘normal’ Dannys’ at the white Danny. While the other ‘normal’ Danny is two foot stomping on the face of a wild Danny. The three regular humans blast their thermoses in random directions other than where the three ‘normal’ Dannys’ are, because the damn wild Dannys’ are literally _everywhere_. 

Tucker slams the thermos down on the head of a wild Danny just in time to see green Danny flying jab white Danny in the chest with the dart, as white Danny physically flings himself at the impact. Both of whom are snarling, teeth fully bared, as they do so. Tucker can’t help crying, “WHAT IS HE TRYING TO DO! PIERCE HIMSELF STRAIGHT THROUGH OR SOMETHING!”. 

Sam winds up rolling through a bunch of used bloody bandages at the same time that three becomes one again. Her grumbling, “can’t he at least throw this stuff out? Lazy fucker”. 

Danny, all back together, fucking books it over to Jazz who throws a thermos straight at his face, he lets it slam into his face. Muttering, while laying on the ground, “now that tickled my nostalgia bone”. Jazz just sighs as everyone continues catching all the wild Dannys’ throughout the night. 

* * *

Danny groans, “remind me to never use duplication to escape my parents ever again”, as he slumps against a wall, “the only positive is that this has to be a new Highscore for number of times one of us almost died”. 

Tucker exhausted slaps him on the chest, “I say lets beat it next year”. Jazz jerks her head over to the boys, “absolutely _not_ , and Danny sit down. There’s no way your legs are healed”. At this Danny starts laughing, “what the fuck does healed even mean anymore!?”. Jazz grimaces at this. 

Sam drags Valerie over to the three, “I say we head back to Danny’s, it’s the only place where we won’t get into serious trouble”. Danny and Jazz scoff, “Hell they’d be proud”. Jazz adding, “plus we have to make up an explanation for the house”. 

“Fuck that! I ain’t doing that! I say watch the fucking news, that’s the fucking story right there!”. 

Jazz looks at Danny, “you know they’ll blame Phantom?”. 

“NO FUCKING SHIT! DO I CARE!? FUCKING _NO_!”. 

Sam smirks, “you could just tell them everything, Pan Fan included”. Danny glares, “FUCK NO! EAT A DICK SAM!”. She just rolls her eyes, “I can’t, I’m vegan”. Valarie groans, “uh guys I’d like a couch right about now. And what’s a Pan Fan?”. 

Danny goes and scoops her up bridal style and just walks off, “Pan means Phantom, Fan means Fenton”, calling back to the others, “you fucks coming or what?”. As Jazz trails after him scolding him about walking on his (still)broken legs. While Danny and Valerie mutter about code words. Tucker and Sam watch them go a bit before following themselves. 

Quickly the yard comes into view, Jazz can’t help but shake her head, “how did you even fit half this all into your walls, Danny”. 

“Fucking creatively that’s how, and now there’s NOWHERE TO FUCKING PUT IT!”. 

Valerie slaps him, “my ears are right here you moron. I would like to keep my eardrums thank you very much”. Tucker just chuckles, “ears, who needs ‘em”. Valerie kicks him with her foot, still being carried by Danny, “me, that’s who”. Stepping over many sharp things, the group heads up to where the door used to be. 

Maddie and Jack wake up just as the five walk inside. Jack hardly seems to notice the destruction but Maddie is stunned. Sam just turns on the tv to the Ghost Watch as Danny lays Valerie down on the half-destroyed couch. 

Maddie only takes in the absurd carnage shown on tv for a little while before turning her attention to the kids. Who are all varying levels of beat up. Danny and Valerie are technically the worst but Danny doesn’t really count. But being ever the mother and not knowing any better, Maddie runs to her son first and demands he sit down. “Danny! What are you doing! You were in no condition to even be leaving the house!”. 

Danny rubs the back of his neck, “things happened and like I said I. Am. Fine”. Sam can’t help but snicker as Danny has to hold his tongue around his parents, they don’t tolerate swearing very well. Maddie just shakes her head, “all of you are going to the hospital, _now_. No buts, Fenton Assualt Vehicle. _Now_ ”. 

This time Maddie carries the little huntress and they all head off to the, very overcrowded hospital. On the ride there they discuss what happened and in a surprise to no one, the Fenton’s blame Phantom and think he must have messed with their dart somehow to cause this. Regardless they scrap the dart project. 

* * *

Luckily, Danny’s ectoplasm levels are so low from overexertion that he doesn’t raise any red flags in Amity. So he gets off with only leg casts, yes two of them. Sam gloats, “would you look at that, you wound up in the hospital anyways”.

“Yeah and the best part? I CAN’T ACTUALLY TAKE THEM OFF!”, Danny flails his now healed up legs around, though he won’t be allowed to remove the casts for months. Since the doctors don’t know _shit_ about him being a halfa or halfa healing. And he wasn’t about to out himself just to avoid casts. 

Tucker raises an eyebrow at Sam, Sam leans over and explains, “his parents had them lined with anti-ghost thread so they won’t even come off in ghost form”, shrugging, “sure they claimed it was to keep any ectoplasm from getting into the healing bones, but whatever”. At this Tucker bursts out laughing. 

“OH FUCK YOU TOO! YOU CAN BOTH DROWN IN FIRE!”. 

Tucker waves a hand at Danny, “oh you love us”, as Danny grumbles incoherently. 

* * *

All over town, there’s Danny shaped dent marks, impalement holes, and other generalized destruction. But, like always, Fenton Works looks the most absurd. There are hundreds of weapons of increasing absurdity strewn all over the yard, house, and road. Most of them are actually Danny’s, though his parents don’t know that. Jazz managed to convince their parents to let them -with Sam’s, Tucker’s and Valerie’s help of course- clean up the outside. So long as Danny swore to stay in a chair the _entire_ time, much to him and his constant-need-for-action’s, dismay. While cleaning, Sam raises an eyebrow at an oddly fish shaped knife, “so what are we going to do with all the wild Dannys’?”. 

Both Valarie and Danny grin evilly, responding with only one word, or more so one name, “Vlad”. 

Not even two hours later, only managing to not break Danny’s promise by carrying the entire chair with them, a mysterious package arrives at Vlad’s mansion. Being so egotistical that he refuses to believe anything could really harm him, Vlad idiotically brings it inside to open it. He doesn’t know yet just how idiotic of a decision that will truly be.

**End.**

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Phantom uses duplication to get Jack and Maddie off his tail.


End file.
